Yesterday, I woke up still dazed from the anesthesia that I inhaled before biopsy and found my husband standing by my bedside. There was a worried look on his face and yet he smiled, that same vibrant smile that can make the pain in my body and all uncertainties whirling in my mind fade away. He asked me if I was okay. I was feeling dizzy and drowsy, but I knew I was all right, because I was no longer in the delivery room. I told him I wanted to go home, but he said I had to go back to sleep and wait a few minutes more. I was going to ask him how long the waiting would take and was about to complain, but then I realized, I wasn’t the one who had been waiting all along. I was just sleeping during the surgery and my husband had been waiting at the hospital lobby for hours. I’m sure he was tired, sleepy and hungry. He works the night shift and that day, he couldn’t get enough sleep, because we had to wake up at 6:30 AM for the two-hour drive going to Seoul National University Hospital. We were in a hurry to get to the hospital before 10 AM and I had no time to prepare breakfast or fix him a cup of coffee.
I asked him if he was hungry. His reply was: “Don’t mind me. I’m okay.”
My husband has always been that caring. He thinks of me first and does not want me to worry. He asked the same question: “Are you hungry?”
“Okay, we will eat (after this). Sleep first. I’ll be back.”
“Where are you going?”
“I will wait outside. Sleep, yobo (honey).”
He held my hand before he left. I closed my eyes and thanked God that the surgery is finally over and most of all, I thanked Him for giving me a devoted husband who is always by my side… a man patient enough to wait for me… not only at the hospital when I am at my weakest, but on many ordinary occasions.
My husband always waits for me: when I put on my make up for almost an hour; when we go shopping together and I try on all the dresses I want; when I don’t wake up earlier and I cook lunch a bit delayed; when I say, “I’ll be there in a minute”, but he has been in the car for a long time and I’m not out yet. From the time that we were dating and until now that we are married, he has shown so much patience in waiting… waiting for me… waiting for the right time.
I used to loathe waiting, but because of my husband, I have learned how to wait… how to be patient… how to endure.
Several hours before the biopsy, I wasn’t allowed to eat and drink. My husband is stricter than a doctor or a nurse. He would not let me take a sip of water, because “that’s what the doctor said”. Although I wasn’t talking to him because I was upset about something that happened the other night, which is actually so trivial, he reminded me many times to take my medicine and to eat dinner before midnight, or else I might get hungry at the hospital. The doctor said I couldn’t eat or drink after 12, and my husband made sure I followed that instruction. He knows how forgetful I am, so he always reminds me to take my medicine, to bring my hospital ID when I have a checkup, to carry an umbrella to work when it’s more likely to rain. He’s like a personal secretary who reminds me of my appointments, the due dates, the documents I need to take care of. I didn’t remember that I had to renew my passport two years ago, but he remembered. He had been telling me to print the flight ticket that I purchased on-line for my vacation in the Philippines next year, and when I forgot to do it, he did it for me. He even attached the ticket to my passport to make sure I won’t lose it. We got married thrice and he remembers all the dates of our three weddings. Sometimes I mix up the dates of our anniversaries, but he never does. Would you believe he even recalls the dates of my ‘periods’ and my schedules with the OB?
I used to forget many things in my life, but because of my husband who is always there to remind me, now I remember all of them: the value of time, the importance of crying and getting past the tears, real happiness and shared laughter, commitments, promises, trust… and most of all, LOVE… the unconditional love between a husband and a wife.
There is never a day my husband fails to tell me or show me that he loves me… and I give back the same love or more every time, because he deserves it.
When my husband and I came to visit my alma mater, one of my former mentors told him, “You are very lucky to marry Christina.”
Now I can say: “I am very lucky to be married to Hyoung Kwan.”
To tell you the truth, I didn’t marry my ‘ideal man’, but I’m glad and blessed that I married the ‘right man’.
- Ways to Love a Man (chrissantosra.wordpress.com)
- My Korean Husband Drinks… Should I Be Bothered? (chrissantosra.wordpress.com)
- Just Say It! (chrissantosra.wordpress.com)
- Blame It on the Duck Meat (chrissantosra.wordpress.com)
- Travails of Marriage (chrissantosra.wordpress.com)
- A Husband and a Wife’s Vow (chrissantosra.wordpress.com)
- Divorce (chrissantosra.wordpress.com)
- Our Love Story: A Scrapbook (chrissantosra.wordpress.com)
- The Absent Minded Husband (thechristianpundit.org)
- A Husband’s Heart (peacefulwife.com)